Incontinence

Incontinence, odd word isn't it. Once again I have a bizarre racing story.

Side Note: The good news is Matt did a kick butt time in a 5k. Great Job. He actually beat me by 3 seconds in my latest run. Good job.

That is right I ran a 26:28 5k in the Waynesburg Homecoming 5K. It is nasty course with a nasty hill. Last year I ran a 24:37. You ask, how could you drop almost two minutes. Well, I could give you a bunch of excuses about how busy work has been the last two weeks, how I got sick and couldn't kick it for 5 days, how I flew to Philadelphia Friday (there and back) for an all day meeting and had a 1.5 hour delay on the tarmac, or how my parents came in Friday night and I stayed up too late talking with them, but none of those excuses could match the real reason I did not finish under 25 minutes. "Incontinence". That is right folks, a 37 year old man in above average health could not hold his pee for 25 minutes.

Now I could cover my pre-race bathroom agenda and how I thought I had covered myself 15 minutes before the race in "all" areas. I still can't tell you why it happened.

I was moving pretty good. The first half of this race is mostly downhill. The second have mostly uphill. I was moving along great, until just before the two mile mark. I was probably about 14th to 15 th place. I felt the urge start. As the hill steepened the urge increased. I thought it is only eight minutes to the finish, I can make it. The hill really steepened and I thought, "what would be the real consequences of peeing, I already stink and am wet". Then I think I actually felt a little come out and I said I can't take it.

This course was set up to pass one intersection 3 times, which also was right next to the start/finish (kind of a three nested loop). Well, to my luck the college's gym was right there. Of course so was my wife, kids and dad. Levi yelled you are going the wrong way as I veered to the left to go into the gym. I couldn't find a men's room so I used a women's room. I won't bore you with the problems of going, except in this case you would have thought it would have been a lot stronger.

It took longer than expected and I then started again. I know I lost a minute with going to the bathroom. I am not sure how much time I lost going up the hill prior to the potty break, because I was definitely slowing down and pinching hard. Also, I felt pretty good the last half mile, but my spirit was broken a little.

Two people had passed me just before I made my break. They finished 24:40 something and 24:58. So, I assume I would have stayed with them. So, I will say I lost 1:30 with my issues, of course my time is my time despite my ability to run 8 min/miles.

The good news is I finished 20th overall and 2nd in my age group. I won a short sleeve Waynesburg College T-shirt for this. I also got the race T-shirt everyone else got, plus a special T-shirt for finishing 3 of the 4 running races in Greene County PA. Not bad for the $15 entry fee because I ate my fill of bananas, apples & cookies (chocolate chip).

My mom is the one who really made out. She signed up to walk. She did a 44 minute 5K as a walker. She won first in her age group (she was the only one in this group, but she also was 2nd for all the woman over 50, which was 5 total, she was the second oldest in the race at 62). Her booty consisted of the race T-shirt, a long-sleeve Waynesburg College T-shirt as a door prize, and a Hooded sweatshirt with Waynesburg College on it for 1st in her age group, plus all the cookies, fruit, water she could drink.

So, all told I was disappointed with my time, but happy with my running. We got 5 t-shirts, a sweatshirt, and a Pirates Baseball cap (friend John won as a door prize and gave to Levi) for our combined $30 dollar fee.

Wow, that was a long, uncomfortable story, but I told everyone so basically I have no pride.

Final side note, I came across a link to the Franklin, PA, Apple Fest 5k. I typed a search for "Warren" and found in 19th place was a dude named Jim Roberts, 37 yrs old with a time of 19:05. You are slumming it hanging around on blog site like this, unless you are looking to be a big fish in a little pond. Nice Run Jim.